One Golden Cage

I have not ventured far, yet. There is a driver on call for when I wish to. I have rupees. others clean my apartment, and cook the food.

Today I bought a book from a woman who belongs to a group who helps Expats to settle in. It has locations for tailors, shops, supplies of all sorts. it has information on do's and don'ts. It should be valueable to me. It cost 500 rupees. I think that is around ten dollars. I'm not used to the money yet. I leave American quarters on the trays for a tip. I am told that fifty cents is a substantial gratuity.

A swarm of Women were gathered to share breakfast and go later to Mah Jong and shopping. I was asked to attend, but it's not my inclination. I don't enjoy gambling. I seldom like to shop. I do not care for the politics that go with Bridge and Mah Jong games .

The questions, and comparisons have already begun. The women talked very fast, spilling information about themselves, their husbands, this place. (Why do people do that?) It makes them nervous that I am quiet and listen, but I take it in. I take them at their words, until further information is available. I have traveled as much and as far as any, two generations of it. I never saw it as anything but life. nothing to boast about, or get medals for. Something to be endured at times.

There is a faction who do charitable works. I will look for them.

They asked me questions: 'why are you getting an apartment so fast when others wait for years? why are you in this place when there is a waiting list for the hotel? Why do you not know this important man who is my husband? he is with 'your' company' .... I said, I am only here three days so I don't know the answers. Everything was planned for us, and we came. .... .... yes, Here we are, plopped in the middle of a whirling desparation of mixed cultures conducting competitive business, in such an acccepting slowed-time place. It remains to be seen if I can once more "walk the bank of the river", instead of being swept along. I like to see where I am going.

I have put on the old shoes I thought I threw out. They fit easily. They need a polish. They are out of style and unloved, but undeniably.. .mine.

The term "Golden Cage" was mentioned, in reference to our being in this place, instead of in the rank and file of local people. The term is used to explain away, and justify isolating expatriate women from becoming involved with local people in any given country. I loathe the metaphor. I have been told that because of this privileged 'golden cage' in which I live, I don't and can't understand "normal" people. I've been told that I am not a good bet as a friend. partly because, I will just leave.

Fine. Let it be. latch the cage, Ignoramous. I do not wish to fight windmills, as Don Quixote did, and as I did when younger. It's useless. The arrogance of true ignorance is complete and immovable.

Wealth is relative,( subjective?) to where you are. With a huge corporation footing the bill, you are wealthy. Back 'home', on your own pocketbook, you are average, perhaps. Neither should affect your standing as a human being. It does though, in the eyes of people whom I think of as short-sighted. I don't compare myself to others, anymore. It comes with wisdom, or age? shrug. comparing only makes you unhappy. you come off as better? or worse? or equal? Then you categorize. Ok.. I'm fatter than her, thinner than her. I have more style than her.... richer than her.... smaller nose... smarter..younger.. older...Until your mind is filled with nonsense. How can that be good? Just be who you are. Appreciate what is before you. Someone who will be a good friend will recognize you as having value for that. ......Others have growing up to do. just give them room.)

The wind is blowing patterns across the lake. ducks are swimming in formation. Someone said there are crocadiles in the lake. I haven't seen one. As I was walking, I noticed that there was a tall cement fence surrounding this place, with eight strands of electrified wire at the top. What does it keep out?

A gilded cage? hmm.